An Open Letter to 2014

It's been a hell of a year.

You brought me a slew of amazing relationships. 
Some were easy, some were not, but all of them worth it in the end. People come and people go, but those that weather through the good and the bad and work alongside you are the most important ones.

You brought me amazing memories.
Silly Greek mixers with amazing people. Conversations on rooftops until late hours in the middle of the week. Excursions to a cabaret. Adventures across Texas and Missouri in Dallas, Austin, McKinney, Carrollton, The Colony, St. Louis, Columbia. Good food and art openings. Long runs and lots of sweaty workout clothes. Failed internships and ones that were the perfect fit. Photoshoots and videos. Italian exploits. Loud, love-filled choruses of "Happy Birthday" in two languages. New people. Not-so-new people but new friendships. Impromptu nights of clubbing. A kick-ass football season. Second chances.

You taught me faith and understanding. 
There are some things in this vast universe that are completely out of our control. Sometimes, you just have to take a step back, take a deep breath, and believe. If it's meant to be, it will be.

You taught me patience and perseverance.
All good things come in due time, if only you are willing to put forth the effort to make them work. Sometimes, working towards improvement is painful but necessary. All worthwhile things in life are worth fighting for and are worth working towards. Be it in two weeks or two years - if it's meant to be, it will be, and additional effort won't kill you.

You taught me trust. 
Sometimes, we must realize that in order for fate to work its magic, we have to let our guard down and put our trust in others. Let them help us, and let us help them in return when they need it most. Let go, and let it happen.

You taught me the value of cardio.
A good pair of running shoes or road bike or swimsuit, hard work, and sweat will alleviate a frenzied mind and will rebalance a shaken spirit. And there's always time to go for a short little run. It's good for the body, but even better for the mind and spirit - especially when you begin to see improvements in agility and endurance.

You taught me to be present-minded.
There's little sense in worrying about the future if it's detracting from the present and what's happening right now. The future is endless and infinite, filled with too many possibilities beyond comprehension; the present is right now and it's fleeting - you only get one shot at today.

You taught me strength.
Even when one of your worst fears becomes reality, the world keeps turning and life goes on. The heart may ache, and breathing may seem laborious, but blood keeps pumping through your body and you are still alive. You are still moving forward, even if each step forward is marred by half a step back; even if each good day is marred by a horrible hour - or a few.

You taught me love.
Love is patient, love is kind; love is a cliche - until you know what it really means. Love is laughter; love is heart-wrenching decisions that you don't want to make but know you have to. Love is memories; love is letting someone incredibly important to you go because you know it's time for the next leg of their journey. Love is affection in many forms - hugs, kisses, shoulders to cry on, invitations to come over for feline therapy, dinners cooked, phone calls answered; love is saying "see you later," never "goodbye."

Bring it on, 2015. Let me see what you've got.

xx
ola

In 2014 I will...

Every year, I make just about the same resolutions. This year however, I got to thinking that I don't quite like the term "resolutions." In my mind, the word elicits the phrase "I resolve to..." which makes me envision a moment where I say, "Oh yeah, I'll do that... Eventually." Then, the "eventually" keeps getting pushed further and further back until eventually it's New Year's Eve again and I've only half-assedly accomplished what I wanted to that year.

So this year, I'm taking a different approach. Instead of resolutions, I've made a list of things that I will do this year.

In 2014, I will...

1. Relax.
   This one is huge for me. One of the biggest struggles I face on a regular basis is my unnerving anxiety. Though I can usually keep the worst of it at bay when I'm busy with school during the semester, it rears its ugly head in my down times and becomes debilitating in its worst moments. So this year? I'm not going to let it get to its worst moments. I am going to relax.
2. Take more photos.
   Okay, okay, so this is one of those resolutions that I make every year... The way I see it, you can never take too many photos! However, I really want to get serious about it this time. I'm a junior in college and "the real world" is rapidly approaching. If I can get my photography out into "the real world" as a plausible way to make money, I'll have a huge step-up after graduation.
3. Continue running regularly.
   I forced myself into running beginning this past summer, and I've gotten increasingly better and better at it. In fact, I may even be starting to like it (but only a little bit). It's a great form of stress relief, and great for keeping me in shape, so it's definitely something I want to continue!
4. Get back into yoga.
   I really dropped the ball on yoga this semester, and I miss it a lot. I know it's going to be a rough few weeks starting back up because my flexibility is not what it used to be, but I realize that it's definitely something I need in my life. It goes hand-in-hand with running - a great form of stress relief and a wonderful way to keep in shape.
5. Post more regular blog posts and work on being consistent.
   I really do love writing blog posts and taking photos to accompany them. This blog provides me with an incredibly creative outlet, and seeing that my words can really resonate with people brings my soul so much warmth. Thus, this year, I'm hoping not to take anymore month-long hiatuses. I really want to force myself to make some time for this blog. It's a form of creative therapy.
6. Read more than just textbooks.
   You know, it's funny. I thought that I really wouldn't have to read too too much as a business major... Which is cute. Sometimes I wonder if I'm assigned more reading than an English major! My assigned readings eat up a huge portion of my free time, and as a result, my time to read for pleasure becomes severely diminished. After getting back into devouring wonderful novels this break, I've realized that I really ought to make a conscious effort to read more during the semester. Hopefully, I can do just that.
7. Write out - or talk about - whatever is making me feel overwhelmed.
   If you know me at all, you probably know that I have a hard time sharing things that are making me upset or overwhelmed with others. It stems from my innate belief that I am "burdening people with my problems" and I don't want to be a bother. However, I've realized that internalizing my problems only makes things worse. In the past few months, I have gotten better at expressing what is making me feel uneasy, and I hope to continue to improve my abilities to do so - both through the written and spoken word.
8. Learn, love, and live by "Don't sweat the petty things."
   This ties back into my first and seventh resolutions. Life's too short to get upset or bothered by minute things that don't matter. I need to remember that.
9. Take time to breathe.
   Another resolution that ties back to the overlying "relax and address your anxieties" theme. It's pretty self-explanatory - I need to take more time to give myself a break and to focus on simply breathing.
10. Never forget to love.
    2014 is only four days in and I have already started off the year feeling an overwhelming sense of gratitude. Life is too short for negative emotions and grudges. Love is all you need.
11. Take myself out... Just because.
    Remember my post about dating yourself? That was my first and only "self-date" experience, and I've realized that I need to have more. It's a brilliant way to unwind and just have some time to breathe.
12. Stop making excuses!
    Pretty self-explanatory. I am awful at this, and it's something that really bugs me about myself. I need to change it.
13. Start drawing again - more than just notebook doodles.
    When I was in elementary and middle school, I drew all the time. I don't know why I stopped. I miss having days with my pen/pencil to the paper and just creating things. It'll be a good way to exercise my creative muscles as well.
14. Reconnect with some old friends.
    I've really fallen out of touch with some wonderful people. I think it's about time I send them a text or a Facebook message... So watch out! ;)
15. Step outside my comfort zone and do something new and scary.
    What that might be, I don't know yet. I just know that I want to try new things and experience the fullest possible flavor of life. There are so many things to be done in this world!
16. Teach myself something outside of the classroom.
    While academia is great and all, I want my learning to extend beyond textbooks and lectures. Learning is one of my very favorite things to do, and I really want to take this year to learn something new that cannot be taught by a lecture. I don't know what that is yet, but I think I can figure it out.
17. Have a kick-ass year!
    I think this one is pretty self-explanatory. 2013 was so good to me... I'm going to make 2014 even better!

Have y'all made a list of what you want to accomplish in the new year? Let me know!

xx

ola